22 June 2011

Auspicious days and love

A bouquet of red roses is still standing on the dressin table. And a minute ago I was looking at my in-coming emails and noticed an old one that came a few days ago from my daughter in India. There were telephone calls too. All were expressions of love for a father on the Father’s Day.

(Earlier we had the Mother’s Day, the Valentine’s Day, Labour Day etc. apart from the more personal ones like anniversary , birthday and so on.)

Right now I am alone in our bedroom because my Makcik is spending a few days visiting her aged mother. And she had her share of Mother’s Day too not very long ago. In a quiet environment and all alone like this, looking at those beautiful red roses, I remember my parents. My father passed away when I was away studying some fifty years ago. My mother died in Mecca over forty years ago. Those were days I never knew of the so-called Father’s and Mother’s Day. So I was never into that.

Do I not love those two most important individuals in my life?

I remember both of them today and every day in my prayers. I even seek HIM to pass on to them whatever rewards HE wishes to give me for any good things I do to day. I want them to share, as a little reward from me for having raised me those difficult years.

Don’t we all wish this of our children? To deserve being loved, let us give them love, not simply the Valentine way.

Berkhidmat kerana Tuhan untuk kemanusiaan


Ninotaziz said...

Deserving love....very subjective. Is not love by definition, unconditional?

Everyday I battle with myself that love to Allah swt is above all. Above parents, above husband, above daughters. It is so difficult when it shouldn't be. Even more difficult to teach our children this simple concept when we crave their devotion, loyalty and respect.

I wish you the fullest joy of fatherhood, Pakcik. Today, tomorrow, for all time.

cikzaa said...

Dear Pakcik,

Me too, never knew of the so-called Father's Day. Father passed away when I was 7 yrs old, 27 yrs ago.
No memory..

Happy Father's Day!

Wan Sharif said...

"Wishing that He pass on to them whatever rewards HE wishes to give me for any good things I do" That's nice.
I thought whatever good deed we do.. our parent will also be the beneficiaries... and HE will not lessen our portion...
May Allah's Magfirah and Rahmah be with us, our family,our siblings,our 'seugama' friends,our parents & teachers(whether dead or alive) and ancestors sokmo sokmo ..

changgeh said...

Oh thats beautiful.Touching the soul in this early morning read.

Al-Manar said...


In my opinion, conditional or otherwise is subjective. Would I love my parents, or siblings, if, for unknown reasons, I were being sidelined by them in the family? I believe there is certain degree of reciprocity in love. Love begets love.

A person like you needs no worry over love for you from your kids. They will remember you even for the bed-time stories alone.

Al-Manar said...


Let us do what we can for the children. We will have our 'days' at the end of it. I know it has been a trying time for you of late. This adds to your love of which you will be duly rewarded one day. You will have your mother's days insya Allah.

Al-Manar said...

Ayah Wang,

I know, a person like you will not have to worry over Father's Day. You have it every day.

Al-Manar said...


We are yet to sit over a cup of coffee. Can you mail me your phone number that I have misplaced? Being a 'bachelor' right now I have plenty of time to spin a yarn!

Wan Sharif said...

Mmm.. spinning yarn with Canggeh over a cup of coffee.. envy! envy!

Cat-from-Sydney said...

Dear Pakcik,
Everyday is Mother's Day in our household....for obvious reasons. Dad is special too.... What is the greatest love of all? To love unconditionally, above self, above reason. And to accept whom you love, warts and all. purrr....meow!

Fara Waheda said...


Every day is father's and mother's day to me...Even we are hundred miles away from the one we love,the unconditional love is for eternity..Sometimes we are not very good at showing how much we love,but it doesn't mean we don't love...

lots of love for you and makcik...Happy Father's Day

Al-Manar said...

Ayah Wang,

Nothing so great about a cup of coffee and empty talk. There is no financial gain in that deal.

Al-Manar said...


... above self, above reason? It sounds like puppy love to me! The subject is too abstract and I cannot go too deep in love.

Al-Manar said...


I am pleased to see that you have resurfaced. It needs love to draw you out. We have been wondering which hospital you are serving now.

nwar said...

Some people say love needs no mention. Some even cringe with the expression of love ! taboo so they say. Courting couples say "i love you" in their every other breath (which renders love meaningless sometimes!). Me? I don't "celebrate" fathers day... well, "love needs no mention" i nod approvingly.
But drowned in the daily city-life chores, calls and emails become infrequent as it should be, and i realize that it is an injustice for my father not to know that i think of him every day. So on fathers day, I say it in every sense of the words, "i love you babah".

kaykuala said...

Dear Pak Cik,
Love and affections are so very apparent when we miss them. The fact that there are these many 'reminders' make them all the more interesting when we realize how we can be more thoughtful. We showed our respect and love before but sadly these were not verbalized as today. Visual expressions by way of cards, messages, celebrations etc seemed to be necessary. But it is a small effort to do so, why not?

Anonymous said...

thanks for the interesting information

Al-Manar said...


Do not belittle an unspoken love which may, at time, be the deepest. And that, offered and received with deep understanding, is the most meaningful of all. Than you.

Al-Manar said...

Akhi Hank,

Why not if the practice is such. But it s hard to break a habit, ot start a new one.

Incidentally, the Birdhouse has not seen a new bird for quite a while. Hope all is well with you.

Al-Manar said...


Siapa agaknya ini. Terima kasih singgah.

Sharifah Rashidah bt. Syed Ahmad said...


I used to think that love needs no mention or exhibition. I love both of my parents very, very dearly. However, for some reason, whenever I met them, I just took their hands and kissed. But, things changed after I got cancer. It was then, when I realised that life is just too short for not hugging and kissing my parents. Syukur alhamdulillah that I survived the cancer. Since then, I would never, never let any opportunity to show my love for them just pass me by. I love them too much.

Al-Manar said...

Cikgu Sharifah,

I first came acrross your blog a couple of years ago and told myself how the writer stood fast when many would have surrendered. For a while I began to think eiher you were plannig to stop writing or, I prayed that that would not the case, you were not well agan.
Than you for teloing me that you are well.

That true life experience tells us all a lot, Cikgu. When you said
'love needs no mention or exhibition' I understand the full meaning of that. As I wrote I never had the chance and the best I can do today is what I can say in my heart, no chance to express physically that very thing called love and affecetion. Thank you for coming around. You will see me returning to visiting you.

Salaam to you.



i'm serving at Hospital Tengku Ampuan Afzan,Kuantan right now..it will be a temporary post until i finish my training for 1 year..

i miss having conversations with you, i hope we will meet soon..

Al-Manar said...


One-year training will soon end, and then I wonder which hospital you will serve - one in Terengganu perhaps?

Cheqna said...

Assalamualaikum Pakcik,

Surely your children are blessed to have parents like you and makcik..and you both deserve their expressions of love.

Thank you for sharing this post. I realised that we sometimes wait on only special days to show our love to ones dearest to us.

For us, it took my dearest sister falling ill to show and say the words aloud to her and to each other, and encouraging the little ones to do the same.

Alhamdulillah she is now out of ICU after more than a week of unconsciousness, but not yet fully recovers, insyaAllah she'll be in good health soon..I'm placing my trust in Allah SWT...DIA yang memberi sedikit dugaan untuk menguji hamba-NYA.

Thank you again Pakcik..somehow this entry soothes me.

Maaf, copying from "Wan Shariff" :

"May Allah's Magfirah and Rahmah be with us, our family,our siblings,our 'seugama' friends,our parents & teachers(whether dead or alive) and ancestors sokmo sokmo .."


Al-Manar said...


Amiin to your doa, Chdqna. Soon, I feel certain, all will be well again.